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Saturday, July 2, 2011

Choosing Happiness

One reason many people are so anxious to find a mate, is because they believe it is the doorway to happiness. They have fallen for the illusion that happiness will be achieved when their prince or princess rides in on a white horse and whisks them away to marital bliss. So, instead of embracing life's precious moments, and living life with passion and purpose each day, they sit in the holding pattern of discontent. This is a choice.

You have heard the expressions - seeing the light at the end of the tunnel, finding the silver lining on the dark cloud, or viewing the glass as "half full" not "half empty". But this can be difficult at times. Each day we have to make that conscious choice to be happy, to focus on the positives, not the negatives. Granted, there are times when sadness is justified. Accept that the human experience can be challenging, difficult, and flawed, but don't dwell on misery. Sometimes when we feel blue, it is because we are transforming and "shedding our old skin" and growing into something better. We don't understand what is happening, and we temporarily feel a loss of our old selves. It is ok to feel a little blue during periods of transformation and contemplation of the self, especially when it means letting go of our old comfort zone, even if it wasn't serving us a positive purpose.

I am not going to promise you a cure for unhappiness, but my intent is to help you open your mind and soul to happiness and to invite it in. Here are a few activities for you to do while you consciously choose to be happy.
  • Dwell daily on the things that make you happy.
  • Make an effort to really make someone else happy.
  • Think about the things you are grateful for - list them, count them, say them aloud.
  • On occasion, or even frequently, find the time to do the things that gave you joy as a child such as drawing or other creative pursuits (without self-judgement of the outcome), blowing soap bubbles with a bubble wand, swing on a swing, play in the sand or dirt, lie in the grass and look at the clouds. 

Just thinking of these things may make you happier. Although this is not a scientific method of achieving happiness, it may just make you feel lighter, happier, and appreciate the simple things in life more..
But perhaps you are thinking that you really want to be loved and that will make you happy. It might be a wonderful accessory to go with your life, but love alone cannot make a miserable person happy to their inner core. But if you wish to add romantic love to your life, start by loving yourself, because happy, caring, loving people attract happy, caring, loving people.

Also, don't give up on yourself if you don't feel happy the moment you make the choice to live this way. You may have years and years of negative programming to re-write. Begin by believing in yourself.

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